15 October 2020

BACK ON TRACK

 

We're back on track with my dad's flat.

We addressed all his worries one by one and none of them were difficult to resolve.  The worries of an old person who lives alone and has nobody to bounce ideas off unless he picks up the telephone.  We all know how problems can get out of proportion in the middle of the night when you can't sleep for thinking about them.

We went to view the flat that's available and it's super.  Clean, modern, well equipped and safe.  I could live there myself.  In fact I couldn't have designed it better for an old person to live in.  Underfloor heating so no radiators - which makes more wall space available for furniture.  A walk in wet room with access from the hall and the main bedroom.  A second bedroom for visitors or to use as a study.  Emergency pull cords everywhere.  We accidentally tested that they worked when Nick caught one with his tape measure and within seconds there was a call loud and clear from the warden.  Perfect.


Of course nothing is ever completely perfect.

Knowing a little about how eyesight changes with old age, I would not have installed dark kitchen units and especially not a dark worktop.  Even with good eyesight it would be hard to see if they need a wipe clean.  Still, the lighting is good and we can get round that.  The oven is thoughtfully at eye level and has a door that opens sideways, not downwards, which means no leaning over it to get things in and out of the oven.  As I said, well thought out.

All being well he will sign up for it and get the keys on Monday.  We have already ordered a new bed for him which will arrive on Tuesday.  We "strongly advised"  against him taking his ancient iron bed that he bought with Mum in 1950 when they were married.  Most of the springs broke years ago and have been replaced with planks of wood.  He was sceptical at first but when he sat on the new divan in the bed shop he couldn't wait to get it delivered.  

Whether or not we can get everything else organised so that he can actually move in on Tuesday is another matter.  We're going to be busy!!



18 comments:

  1. That's a great looking flat. I like the huge windows.

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    1. Tom, it's a lovely flat. He's on the first floor and has a view over a small garden with seating and lovely trees. It could be a lot worse.

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  2. Great stuff, Flat looks great, I am sure he will be fine and all for the best in the long run. Sorting Mum's personal belongings has been very difficult for me and still an ongoing bit of work, at least he will be able to take much of his to the flat.

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    1. Colin, I can imagine how difficult that is to do. At this point we will be thinning out his belongings so that the house can be sold. There's no rush but no point in delaying either. There will be emotional days I'm sure.

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  3. I'm so happy to read all this. I was lucky with my mother, who decided at age 75 that she needed to sell her house and move into an apartment in a retirement complex. She was very happy there from 2005 until 2018, when she passed away. I always enjoyed going to spend time with her there.

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    1. Ken, it's a shame that my father has left it so late to do this, but once it's done, it's done.

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  4. So pleased that things are becoming to come together. Pleased for Don that he will be less vulnerable, and pleased for you and Colin for the peace of mind sheltered housing for Don will bring.
    I'm sure there will be challenges ahead as you decide which bits of furniture to take, and once he is settled, the preparation of his house for sale.
    I didn't have this to contend with, but both my mother and father died within a year - unexpected for my mother at 69, so the sorting of her belongings and house sale were difficult. I'm sure there will be memories for you as you sort through things. You are fortunate to have Nick to support you through this. Bon courage xx

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    1. Gaynor, that was tough for you, both of them dying so close together. It's never easy to do, but some circumstances are more trying than others. Because we're effectively doing the bulk of it now it might be easier when the inevitable happens, but who knows?
      Since I wrote this we have been moved up a tier in the scale of covid lockdown rules and restrictions. We're crossing fingers that it won't stop us going ahead.

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  5. ...should say beginning to come together!

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  6. I hope you manage to get him moved in case any delay feeds his misgivings. I strongly believe that you are doing the right thing in supporting his transition to independent living within a sheltered environment.I'm sure Don knows this too x

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    1. I have until now found the rules straightforward to understand but this time we have read them over and over and can't make up our minds whether his move will be possible or not!
      We're trying to think of a reason why he might need to go there for an eye test - that should do it! It worked for Cummings so why not him?!

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    2. I checked with the flats manager this morning and we can go ahead, as long as everyone observes the rules on distance and masks etc.
      That's a relief.

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  7. Hoorar! Hooray!!
    May your Dad be very happy there....
    Pauline's Dad was.... reckoned he should've moved much sooner.

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    1. Tim, I really wish he had and I think he will too!

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    2. Walt's grandmother, who was in her mid- to late '80s, said the same thing. She couldn't believe she waited so long to sell the house and move into an apartment. She passed away at 92.

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    3. Ken, we're hoping that my dad will have some quality time there and that it's not too late for him to make the most of what it has to offer. He's become much more doddery in mind and body due to having spent the last six months not going anywhere, or seeing anyone but us. He will be 92 next month.

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  8. he seems a lucky fellow; the place looks lovely.

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    1. Michael, it is lovely, I could happily live there myself.

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